Thursday, September 29, 2005
Kids, Don't Try This At Home
or: The Accidental Pyro
or: Why I Never Cook
So, last night I tried to burn my house down. Yep. Call it the 2a.m. crazies.
Background: My husband cooks with the oven, but instead of using pans, he just throws meat in there. Yeah, I know. Apparently this is one part of housebreaking that I missed with him. Anyway, after he is finished he turns the oven onto the clean cycle.
So last night, after he was safely tucked into bed, I was examining the oven during it's clean cycle, and I noticed that there was a latch labeled "to clean." I engage this latch.
Let me just share some things with you right now. I am a believer, I believe that the Lord is an active part of my life, and He works through me, around me, wherever to let me know that He is with me. Last night was just a re-affirmation of my faith.
I clearly remember standing in the darkened kitchen (post latching the oven) and wondering why I was still so awake. I tend to go to bed late, but usually 1a.m. late, not 2a.m. late. I also remember shrugging and sitting down at the computer to play some games to help lull me to sleepy-land.
The next time I looked up I noticed that it seemed foggy in our house. Weird. So I go into the kitchen to examine what is going on. Lo, our oven was smoking copiously. Of course I immediately go into panic mode, and in panic mode I tend to block out common sense voices and such that let me know I should not be trusted in an emergency situation.
So, I get some water and pour it down one of the grates (door wouldn't open). Later, after rousing my husband from bed he pointed out the major things that were not smart about my actions. 1. Water tends to make a GREASE fire worse, (duh) and 2. I had poured water down one of the grates on our ELECTRIC range (duh).
Okay, and one other thing. I always pshawed about smoke, and thought that people who were overwhelmed by smoke were sissies. I mean, its just smoke, right? Get out and stop your crying. Well, last night I learned my lesson the hard way. Smoke is debilitating. You can't breathe, you can't see because your eyes hurt so bad. Your stupid instincts take over, making you cough and your eyes water, neither helping the situation any. It is a terrifying situation. I will no longer pshaw smoke.
Just so you know, everyone here is fine. I did have the common sense to corral all of the animals into our bedroom, which was the furthest away from the smoke. Right now, the house still stinks, but most of the smoke has been ventilated out.
Oi!
1 Comments:
Wow. Glad to hear you're doing alright! Man, that sucks. Did you suffer any damage to your lovely home? Is the stove still usable?
Speaking of, I believe I need to clean my oven. Lo, I am now scared of it . . .
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