Monday, January 29, 2007
Futility, I Dedicate This Exercise To You
I swing at the ball, and the bat gives a satisfying crack. The ball goes sailing down the correct side of the foul line. It is definitely going to float over the fence.
Then a huge (and random) gust of wind blows it right into the outfielder's mitt, giving the opposing team the win with my out.
(For those of you who don't know what is going on: baseball metaphor.)
The ball is my state of sleep. I was so so so close to absolute muzziness. Mr. Beans is both the wind and the outfielder. Just as I was reaching for the brass ring of an absolute perfect round of dream time, Mr. Beans decides he needs attention. NOW!!!!
His favorite way of letting me know is to head-butt my face. Hard. He did this about 5 times. Then he proceeded to get onto my stomach, and milk step like it was his job.
I laid in bed for a good 15 minutes, trying to will back that perfect moment of oblivion. And here I am now, typing away about it because I can't call any of you to complain.
The End.
Of Mr. Beans! Mwah hah hah hah hah!
Just kidding.
Saturday, January 27, 2007
I'm Going To The Superbowl!!! And other various good things.
So, as all of my readers know, the Colts are going to the Superbowl. And I am going with them!
It all started at the AFC game. I was so nervous! They gave us these towels that had the Colts helmet and the Patriots helmet on them. By the end of the game, my towel had been de-nuded of the Patriots helmet. For all of you who watched the game, you know how nerve-wracking it was to be a Colts fan that night!
Going to the Superbowl has caused quite a flurry at work. I have become a semi-idol because everybody thinks it is so cool that I get to go. And then there are my co-workers, who are plotting my demise so they can have my ticket. The best scheme so far involves one of the girls carrying my luggage to the airport. Then she is going to hit me in the head with it and shove me in the trunk of the car. She hasn't quite gotten around to explaining the physical differences to my dad yet. But she still has some time.
I also got a new car yesterday! It is pretty pretty! Here is a picture of her. Yes, she is female, because she is so beautiful! I have to come up with a name for her. I have been thinking of Molly, but I'm undecided. If any of you have any ideas for a good name, let me know!
Okay, I know this post has been bland and dry so far. Here's why. Have you ever had so many good things happen to you at once that you don't want to mess it up by talking about it? I am not a superstitious person by nature, but come on! Going to the Superbowl and getting a new car? I feel like once I reach the top of this run of good stuff, the journey down is going to be hell to say the least. If nothing else, life probably won't be this exciting again for a long long time.
So, I post this with bated breath.
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Pee Queen
Yep. That's right. I have been dubbed 'Pee Queen.' All because of two little incidents.
The first one happened about 2 weeks ago. I picked this cat up out of the scale, and she let it pour. On the floor. On the counter. On her file. And on my shirt. Lucky for me, we have spare scrubs and a washing machine and dryer. I cleaned up the mess in the room, changed my top, and got to work making a new file for the pee-line. (Get it?) The vet started asking me if he could have the file (in a semi-irritated tone that I didn't care for). I waved the pee-soaked file at him and told him to go to town with it if he wanted to. He judiciously decided to wait for the new file.
The second incident happened this weekend. It was a stupid dog that I was picking up to put on the exam table. He all of a sudden let go of this massive amount of pee. Incidentally, we were seeing him because of a urine/bladder problem, and his owner was able to get very little out of him that morning. Apparently he was saving it for me. Once again my scrub top and long sleeved t-shirt fell victim to the pee. This time the pee was in one strategic area. Let's just say this: It soaked through on one side to my Victoria's Secret.
And now my co-workers have dubbed me the Pee Queen. Awesome. Just what I always wanted.