Wednesday, July 12, 2006
My Fabulous Life
While recently reading this month's issue of InStyle magazine, I came across this Q&A interview with Keira Knightley. So, I thought I would put her answers to these questions up against mine, and you can judge which of us has the better life.
(I'm not sure this is entirely legal, but what are the chances of someone from InStyle finding it?)
Key For This Post-
Q= Question (duh)
KA= Keira's Answer
MA= My Answer
Here we go!
Q: Best advice your mother ever gave you?
KA: Don't mix your drinks. Yeah.
MA: Freak not!
Q: Strangest thing we'd find in your handbag or fridge?
KA:I had nail varnish in my fridge for a while. No idea why. I think I got confused.
MA: A Sharpie permanent marker. It is handy for signing the back of a credit card, or for getting a quick autograph.
Q: Best-kissing co-star?
KA: Johnny Depp certainly wasn't bad.
MA: The Baby Jesus. (During a church skit.)
Most embarrassing songs on your iPod?
KA: Abba's Greatest Hits. I've got a lot of Liza and a lot of Judy, as well. you need them for that time of the month.
MA: I would have to say the Rent soundtrack. Whenever it comes up on shuffle, people are like "what is that?".
Q: Hypothetical: You're cooking for a dinner party and drop the roast. Do you still serve it to guests?
KA: F*** yes! Are you kidding? Dust it off and put it back on the plate.
MA: I have to agree with Keira here. First of all, I took the time to cook. Something. Anything! Second of all, you should consider that a good warning if I happen to issue a dinner invite. Your dinner may have already been on the floor.
Q: Beer, wine, or cocktail?
KA: In Italy, wine. Is it a barolo? In New York, it's a cocktail- a champagne one. You can't beat them. Or a kir royale, if only because it sounds like my name so I can always remember it. No matter how smashed I get.
MA: Oooo. Nice one, Keira. Anywho, for me, two words: Mar. Tini.
Q: Best big-event goody-bag item?
KA: A stay at the Bulgari Resort in Bali. Haven't been on it yet, though.
MA: I once got a full-size candy bar for Halloween. And I ate it.
Q: When you heard Reese Witherspoon's name announce as best actress on Oscar night, your first thought was?
KA: Thank God I don't have to make a speech! We all knew who it was going to be. I just giggled- it was so weird, laughing was the only option. My friends wanted me to do an "I've been robbed!' thing, and I was so tempted because nobody ever does that. I think it would have been hilarious 'cause that's all you want, for someone to go...[she makes a grimacing face].
MA: Reese got that Oscar? I am so happy for her. When did that happen? A long time ago? Huh. Must have missed it.
Q: Most outlandish rumor about you?
KA: That I've been going out with lots of blokes I've never even met. So I'm sure I'm having fun. There are also various boy band-ish types I'm supposed to be stalking. I've never even met anyone from a boy band.
MA: That I am married to Dan Marino. Please. Who starts these things anyway?
Q: If you were queen of England, the very first thing you'd do?
KA: Move all my friends into Buckingham Palace.
MA: Make it illegal for idiots to exist. Starting with you, question person! You'd?
Q: Guys might be surprised to know you find this attractive.
KA: Backs and hands. I'm like, 'Turn around! I'm not interested in the front of you. Just the back.
MA: Another nice classy answer, Keira. Also? Are you looking for hands in the back? I guess that would concern me too.
Q: Juiciest celebrity encounter?
KA: I was speechless sitting next to Jack Nicholson at the Oscars. I can't remember what he said to me. Everyone asked if he tried to hit on me, but he didn't. It's actually kind of embarrassing that he didn't.
MA: It is? He is old enough to be your grandfather. You should be embarrassed for being embarrassed.
Q: Best beauty tip?
KA: If you've got any let me know, 'cause I don't have a clue.
MA: Right. Well, I recommend starting your day off with a shower. It is hard to be beautiful if you are smelly. Unless you are far far away from everyone else.
Q: Favorite phrase of the moment?
KA: "Am I bothered?" It means 'do I care?' It comes from British comic Catherine Tate, who does this character called Lauren the Teenager. Her tagline is 'Am I bothered?'
MA: Shut it. And variations of 'Shut it.'
Q: You've been a brunette, you've been a blonde. Do fair-haired girls have more fun?
KA: I only think that when I've got blonde hair. Am I bothered?
MA: I've had enough with the questions. Shut it.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Happy 4th!
So, I had a fun 4th weekend.
On the 3rd, Hubby and I went out on his sister's boat for the day. He got deep fat crispy fried, which kind of serves him right since I offered him some of my 500+ sunscreen and he refused. I also got deep fat crispy fried, but only a little bit. Patches of my face, and my shoulders. (Shoulders were Hubby's responsibility. He's fired. Or fried.) Also, the top of the lower half of my right leg, because I had it perched up on the side of the boat. Good times!
On the 4th, we headed over to my parents house for firework festivities. My parents live on this lake with an island in the middle. This is the place that we go to to launch fireworks for everyone's viewing pleasure. This year I got to go out to the island to set off fireworks.
The island is a tiny mound of dirt, rocks, plant life, and scary bugs.
So the game plan was to put our launchers at the bottom of the island near the water, light stuff in the launchers, and run as fast as you can up the hill to get as far away from the lit stuff as you can.
My dad was in charge of what are called "cakes." Cakes are basically a firework thingie with multiple fireworks coming out of it, instead of just one. Anyway, his cakes were going off maybe 5' from where my launcher was positioned.
At one point, he said "you can go ahead and go down." (One of his cakes was busy firing away.) I said "how bad would you feel if those were your last words to me?"
Later. I had lit my firework and was trying to run up the hill. Fell. Hard. Hurt. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Fell on rocks. Can't get up.
Luckily, the fuse on my firework had gone out, so I was in no danger of losing body parts to the blast.
As I am laying there, trying to get up, my dad so helpfully informs me that I can go ahead and re-light the fuse on the firework. I asked him if I could get up first. He said no, the show must go on. Such a love.
Oh, and now that I think about it, I had a punk in my hand when I fell, which I somehow managed to hold onto. That's talent.